Is it normal for a person to experience anxiety? Yes, it is undoubtedly, because this state helps to evaluate the level of danger and adequately take measures to respond to events caused by this state.
In cases where the parent has an alarm for his child, this is a sign that there are any problems in the family. Alarm is needed! This is a way for an adequate assessment of the level of danger and response to making decisions in one situation or another.
However, you should not take a pathological manifestation of anxiety as the norm! She has nothing to do with real life and requires the help of a specialist with her decision.
How to distinguish pathological and real anxiety? If the child has limitations more than necessary - it is pathological anxiety.
An example is the situation: a teenager is 16 years old parents forbid to go to the movies with friends, since the cinema should be driven 3 stops on public transport. Parents motivate their decision alleged care about him, but the teenager perceives such a refusal as pressure and the decision for it.
Why the level of anxiety becomes elevated:
- already existing anxiety "winding";
- A person belongs to the type "All perceive with anxiety", and this relationship is copied in parent.
How to determine how much you are in an anxiety zone? Look, what frameworks for behavior are other parents for their children about the same age and in similar situations.
For example, in the 9th grade, none of the classmates of your child calls after it came to school. And you demand, and you live in one stop from school. If the road was engaged in transport for a long time, then such a requirement would be justified.
Or deprive the child's trip to the zoo, only because of the fact that reading received 4, and not 5. If there was an agreement, it is better not to break it, and reading can be postponed for the evening, and it will be much easier perceived than in punishment .
What will help to cope with anxiety:
- "Call to a friend" will help when, for example, a child outside the access zone. Maybe he just got charging on the phone? Call back someone from friends, with whom it should be now, and ask to give the phone.
- Be in touch with parents of friends and teachers. Do you know what your child's parents call your child? And the teachers who conduct additional electives on biology? Meet the contacts.
- Share responsibility with the second parent, do not take everything on yourself. In response for upbringing, both parents are always!
- Professional assistance in the form of consultation with a doctor when necessary, will reduce the anxiety and give an understanding how to move in terms of the child's health.
- A group of support in social networks, on parent forums, in a group of district with the same parent will help on the other side to see the decision on the same situations as yours, and find a right decision, support.
Parent in a state of anxiety is not the best example for the child. In this case, he will not learn to adequately think about situations and make decisions. Such an attitude will be aware of when the child becomes an adult and his family will appear.
Recipient your attitude to situations with "tightening nuts" and interfere, only when your participation is required. Trust each other more, and the result of harmony and trust will not make yourself wait long.
Author - Olga Melnichuk
Source - Springzhizni.ru.