Almost all women who are lucky enough
Mama, share their feelings when they first saw their newborn babies. They say that the heart is immediately filled with love, and it is already impossible to imagine life without this little, defenseless lump. In fact, many mothers are silent that in the first days or even months do not feel admiration for the form of a baby. On the contrary, he can cause irritation, the woman feels only fatigue and emptiness inside, and caring for the child mechanically, because it is necessary.
Mom from England honestly admitted that he did not feel feelings for the child
The idea is actively promoted in society that a woman must inflate with love for the baby, as soon as he sees two stripes on the test. But quite often moms, looking at their newborn babies, do not feel any feelings for them. This is not customary to admit, because others will immediately begin to condemn and say that only bad mothers love their crumbs. And here is a woman after childbirth looks at the screaming bundle and understands that no love does not feel.
Inside the torment begins, the feelings arise that something is wrong with the mother, because it should be delighted with one type of infant. A woman suffers from a sense of guilt that it is not like everyone else's moms. This may cause postpartum depression, a serious illness that requires the intervention of psychologists or even psychotherapists.
Barbara Hopkins, the teacher of the English school, honestly told how she coped with the lack of gentle feelings to his own son. The Englishwoman posted a frank story on the Internet about how a woman can suffer due to the lack of love for the child. She says that it is impossible to be silent about it, you should not keep negative feelings in yourself, make thoughts that you are a bad mother.
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What writes in the Barbara network
When I gave birth to my son, I did not feel any love for him. It was wonder how I was able to endure and give birth to a child. I had a cesarean section, and I sometimes reflect on, perhaps it was that in the first moments there was no feeling. After the operation, I was very bad: the whole body was sick, sick, my head was spinning. I only thought about how to come to my senses, and I didn't even remember my son.
It seems to me that love for the child often comes gradually. The body should recover, you need to realize that there will be no old life. I passed so much physiological and mental changes from the moment you became pregnant. It is a serious stress for the female organism, and, of course, he needed time to come to himself. In addition, during the recovery period, you need to care for the child: feed, bathe, walk. The brain takes a new life gradually, and you do not need to feel the monster just because you do not cry from the dignity when you look at the sleeping baby.
Previously, I often heard that the love of the baby arises immediately as soon as you see him after childbirth. Some say that they begin to love crumb when he still lives in your stomach. I have not experienced similar emotions. No, I was not scared, sad, sadly. But the maternal love, which is spoken about and write about and write, was not. The first days I thought what was wrong with me. I considered myself a bad mother, even sorry my son, because he was born from a woman who would never be able to love him like others.
I soothe myself that everything would be different at home. But when we were discharged from the maternity hospital, nothing has changed. I just cared for my son, because it was my duty. Sometimes she rolled the excitement, because I experienced the same feelings to my son as to your cat. Probably, it is impossible to give such a comparison, but this is exactly what I felt.
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How to appear maternal love
When I convinced myself that I was the worst mother in the world, unexpectedly, I was overwhelmed by feelings for my son. What many moms write about when you look at the child and the heart is ready jump out of the chest.
The first days and nights after discharge from the maternity hospital were incredibly complex. My husband and I did not know what to do with the child. In the maternity hospital, the nurse was deftly washed and dressed their son, and we did not succeed at all. The son could not take the chest correctly, shouted from hunger, and my hands went down. I even asked my parents to come to the rescue, because I understood that we would not cope with my husband.
Once I went to the crib when the son was crying. He pulled a handle and hit me slightly. And at that moment awareness came that I was responsible for this little man. For him, I am a whole universe, the only person next to which he is warm and cozy. We are associated invisible bonds that never will be broken.
The new feeling was overwhelmed by me, from somewhere there were strength to withstand loud crying, sleepless nights, other numerous problems that young parents inevitably face. I realized that everything was ready for my son, life to give, if you need. Love for the son suddenly filled my heart, I realized that it was he now - the most important person for me. And he will remain for life.
At that moment I wanted to take a picture to capture this moment when I realized that I love my son with all my soul. Tears did not stop in any way and continued to roll on the cheeks.
I want to reassure all moms who are worried about the lack of sublime feelings for children immediately after delivery. Love will come, because it is the most important feeling that can fit in the female heart. Just sometimes you need to wait, it is not immediately coming this magical feeling, but it will definitely surf. After all, only mom can love children so much, with all the soul, with all my heart.