Ke, amabhodlo angama-2020 ahlala ngasemva. Nangona kunjalo, kubantu abaninzi, kubonakala ngathi, kuncinci kuncinci, ngaphandle konyaka kwikhalenda. Ukuba unomdla kwindlela eyilungiselela ngayo iinyanga ezizayo ze-Wilshog-kwaye, mhlawumbi, fumana uvuyo-Nazi ezinye zeengcebiso.
Cwangcisa ulonwabo oluncinciUkuba uziva ngohlobo lwabantu abaqhelene noJanuwari ukwenza icebo elikhulu kulo nyaka uzayo, kancinci. "Ngoku ungacwangcisa izinto ezincinci zeDyunivesithi yaseVirginia Bethany Tichman. Ukususela kwizicwangciso eziqhelekileyo zosapho lwayo - njengabanye abantu abaninzi - waya esothuka, weza nendlela yokwakha ixesha labo. Ilungu ngalinye losapho laphuma nomsebenzi onomdla. Umzekelo, ngesicelo sentombazana endaliza, abalandeli bomboniso "olona bhakibi babalaseleyo, intsapho yagqiba kwelokuba 'icofe itoni yezithako kwaye yenze into enzima kakhulu." Cwangcisa "yonke into ezikukhulisa uvuyo," kangangoko kunokwenzeka kwiinyanga ezizayo, uTichman uyacebisa.
Chonga into ebalulekileyoKusekho iinyanga zokuthintelwa kwangaphambili, kwaye ubhubhane unokubonakala isohlwayo esingapheliyo. Nangona behleli ekhaya kwaye bayeke ukuhamba-kunongenantolongo, kukho into enye enokufundwa kumabanjwa ahambelana nayo, i-Mitch Abrams, i-PSCHOMS Unyango lwezempilo yezengqondo kwiintolongo ezitsha zejezi.
Ugqirha Abrams uhlala ubeka izigulana zayo iminyaka emininzi, umzekelo, yintoni kwaye ibalulekile kuwe? Ungathanda ukubona njani ilifa lakho? Kwaye ukulungele ukwenza ntoni ukwenza ubomi bakho kangangoko kunokwenzeka kwiimeko ezikhoyo? Kwaye enye into: "Sizizidalwa zentlalo. Iimeko ngamanye amaxesha zenza kube nzima ukwakha, ukomeleza kunye nokuphuhlisa ubudlelwane. Ungabuhlakulela njani ubudlelwane kunye nawe ukuze wenze okufanayo kubudlelwane nabanye abantu? "
UGqr Abram Abram utsho ukuba iminyaka engama-21 yamava ezintolongweni zamfundisa izinto ezimbini. Okokuqala, abantu bazisola kakhulu kwaye bayakwazi ukuziqhelanisa, okwesibini, ulonwabo luvela ngaphakathi. Uthi: "Okukhona uyixabisa into onayo, engcono uziva ngayo. -Andizi izinto eziphathekayo. Isenokuba kukulingana kwakho ngokunyaniseka, kunokuba yimpilo yakho. "
Hlala ngalo mzuzuI-Psychology yemidlalo yonyamezelo isixelela ukuba umzimba uyakwazi kakhulu kunengqondo ecinga. (Ukuba umntu othile uxelele ngoMatshi, kuya kude kube nini na ubhubhane, ungacinga ukuba unokuhlangabezana nale nto?) Ke kugxile kumzuzu wangoku, hayi kumfanekiso opheleleyo.
Ixhala liphakama ngenxa yokuba uhlehliwe kwikamva, kodwa "ukuba ugcina amandla okwexeshana," uthi: "Ugqirha wezengqondo uthile, ngamanye amaxesha kuya kuba lula kangakanani, Umbhali wesifundo obangela ixhala kunye noxinzelelo phantsi kweemeko zokuchithwa.
Ungahlala njani kulo mzuzu? Zonke izihlobo zokuzilolonga, enye yazo kukudwelisa izinto ezintlanu onombulelo, nokuba zincinci kangakanani - ewe, ikomityi yekofu eshushu ibalulekile. Xa uziva uxinezelekile, cinga ngokuhamba ngeyure elandelayo okanye ngosuku olulandelayo, kwaye hayi kwiveki ezayo okanye kwinyanga ezayo.
Izifundo ze-DR. Daniels Sundemic zibonise ukuba iindlela zokusinda zisinde zinjengokuphindaphindayo kwaye zisebenzisa inkcitho engaphezulu kakhulu - ichaphazele inqanaba loxinzelelo, njengenkxaso exhasayo. Uthi: "Zama ukwenza into elungileyo, kodwa ngokuqinisekileyo musa ukwenza okubi," utshilo. Akukho mntu unikezela ukwala i-cocktail ekupheleni kosuku okanye ikhekhe lasemva kwemini. Ngokoluvo lwayo, kuvela iingxaki ukuba uhlala usebenzisa ezi zinto ukutshintsha imeko yakho, kwaye uzive uzive unetyala ngenxa yoko.
Fumana into onokuyilawulaUkuba uziva intiyo yebhulukhwe, oku kungenxa yokuba inento enye eqhelekileyo ekuthinjweni. Olu lulwazi olusisiseko, luthathela ingqalelo ipolisa langaphambili kunye nengqondo yomkhosi osuka eMzantsi Wales Emma Kavana, ofundise i-Psychology yengqondo yokuxoxa. Abantu abathi, bebanjwe buthathaka bengqondo baziva bhetele, bahlala bezama ukubuyisela ulawulo malunga nokusingqongileyo. Batsho: "Namhlanje ndiza kwenza amanyathelo ali-100 kwikhamera" okanye "ndiza kwenza iingxoxo ezingama-50."
"Ezinye zezisombululo zakho zinceda ukubuyisela imvo yolawulo," amanqaku eKavan. Ukuzilolonga kukhetho olufanelekileyo, kuba lunyusa inqanaba lee-andorphin, kodwa akufuneki ukuba ubulewe de kube kukubila kwesixhenxe. Isenokuba yiyo yonke into ekwenza uzive ulawule ngamava akho emihla ngemihla, nokuba luhlobo oluthile lwendlela okanye isiko elincinci lemihla ngemihla.
Yonwabela ukuguquguquka kunye nokunyamezelanaKwintuthuzelo epapashwe ngo-Okthobha ku-Okthobha kwindawo yejenali kwi-psychology, yayiqwalaselwa njani ngokungathandabuzekiyo. Kwisifundo esinye, inxalenye yabathathi-nxaxheba bayathetha ukuba baya kuthetha ngentetho (yona ngokwayo kufuneka iyothusa), inxalenye yesibini - ukuba baya kuyivavanya le ntetho, kwaye baya kufunda kamva ukuba kufuneka wenze. Emva koko onke amaqela asombulula ii-anagrams ezintsonkothileyo, kunye neqela elalingazi ukuba zenza ukuba zenze ukuba le nto ibenze le nto incinci yokuzama ukusombulula iipuzzle. (Oku kulandelayo kwinani labo babecinga ukuba bafuna ukuthetha ngentetho.)
Enye yeenkcazo-ntetho ichaza ukuba xa kukho ukungaqiniseki, "abantu bagcina amandla abo onke ukubonakala kwento abangazaziyo," unjingalwazi we-psychology ye-psycchology yeTexas yeTexas yeTexas ye-tenderia yophando.
NgokukaTichman, owayefunda nokungaqiniseki, okuncinci evezwe kwi-infinibility kwaye enamachaphaza elona nyango kunye nokungaqiniseki kwabantu abaguqukayo. Ukuba ukhe watsiba, zibuze, nokuba uyakukhalaza kwizigqibo okanye unenjongo. Ngaba ikhona enye indlela yokujonga le meko? Unokucinga ngomntu othandabuzayo, kwaye ucinge indlela lo mntu uzihlangabezana ngayo noxinzelelo, nokuba wasabela njani kule meko. Abantu abanesiqingatha seglasi ayinanto, ungakhathazeki: oko akuthethi ukuba kufuneka ucinge ukuba izinto ziya kuhamba kakuhle. "Akukho ndlela ichanekileyo kuphela yokucinga malunga neemeko, kuba umxholo kunye neemfuno zihlala zitshintsha," utsho uTichman.
Ukunyamezelana nokungaqiniseki kunokuphuculwa-nkqu nakwiimeko zokufakwa. Zama into entsha, ongakhange uyenze ngaphambili, kunqweneleka ukuba uyakoyika kancinci. UGqr Thichman wazama ukutsiba ngeparachute nakwi-tarzanque ukuzicheba, kodwa akufanelanga ukuba uye kude. Unokubhala nje umyalezo kumntu osanda kudibana naye kwaye ungathanda ukwenza abahlobo. Undoqo lwenza into ongayiqondi kakuhle ukuba yonke into iphelile, kuba ikwenza ukuba ubeke ukungaqiniseki.
UTichman uthi: "Ungayenza. "Akukho nto, kodwa ayiyingozi." (Kulungile, ukuba awukhethi umdlalo weparachute.)