The loser is a person or not - to solve only him. All species of others are only their subjective opinion. Of course, there are social criteria.
For example, when we know the person well, its level, talents and starting capabilities. I admire them even - at school, at the university. We expect high achievements, we enjoy from the side, and then we meet ... a loader on a vegetable database or a taxi driver. It turns out, intelligence, ability, the level of claims did not receive exit. Something stalled, went wrong ...
You can observe three types of such people.
1. Generously gifted by nature, "Favorites of the Gods", can be said. Combination of mind, charm, mental subtlety. Mature of talents. Family with resources for the development of such a child. Since childhood, it is customized on a brilliant career, personal happiness, bathing in luxury.
And here is a mistake! Everything is given to such a person without difficulty, as a magic wand, always in everything. He does not apply effort, does not knock down the hands of the rocks of the rock called "Peak overcoming", does not tolerate the flour of creativity, does not produce her bread in the sweat of the face. " But, as you know, parents are not eternal. As well as resources accumulated by them. Left alone, such a person discovers its very limited viability.
Meeting, now one for one, real obstacles, he breaks quickly. Or retreats in horror: "Here it is what, a real life!" All this end with degradation at a low social level. The remains of the intellectual habits are gradually fade, and we can observe in old age of the flap from the tests of a person, with indestructible treasure to communicate with their former environment where he is now closed forever.
2. Intelligence and abilities are much higher than the environment, "Little Genius" in the family of Pygmeys. Realizes its gifold, suffering from the impossibility to realize it or at least develop to the level it necessary. Unfortunately, there is no at least one person who can appreciate the brilliant abilities of the child and help him in changing the situation. Often parents are disliked the "clever", tease and beat, as if shelter his poverty.
So, among my patients there was a young man with outstanding mathematical abilities, whose parents hated him for it, forbidden to enter the university and forced to work as a janitor in the local housing system (80s of the last century). As a result, depression, early alcoholism, suicidal inclinations.
Often over the years, such people become angry and envious, trying to devalue all those who managed to realize themselves. They understand a lot by virtue of their intelligence, but because of the brokenness is no longer able to rise.
3. People who failed due to someone else's evil will. Often smart, capable young people suffer from some degree of idealism, too naive and enthusiastically perceive reality. These are more experienced their colleagues, leaders, even relatives. It is presented with a young man as a necessary initial contribution "to the general case": the development of science, the prestige of the native university, help the company's team. "Who, if not you?".
Years are held, but a talented employee still remains as a "generator of ideas", for which others receive weighty profits, or literary slave, or free assistant "his teacher." There is no social, professional, financial growth.
After some time, the need to disappear in the already elder the "talent", and it is demolished in "ordinary employees." Starting something late, and there are almost no resources. Is it aware of the ruthlessly used itself, and then thrown as unnecessary, tragedy of his position? Yes of course.
Only one thing can be advised: seeing at least a spark of talent, realizing my abilities, noticeably superior to those in the peers, begin to treat them carefully, we dose them to the world, appreciate what they got like the gift of God. And, of course, learn to protect them - from parasitic "mentors", a curious crowd, envious views of others.
Author - Oksana Arkadyevna Filatova
Source - Springzhizni.ru.