Psychologists say that parents of alcoholics most often children also grow with
from alcoholic beverages. We will tell the story of a woman, let's call her Alena, who grew up in a family where Mom saw, but herself was able to quit a detrimental habit of his family.
Childhood Alena
For childhood I do not want to remember. It was a terrible time. We, children, have always been hungry, we didn't have normal clothes, but I generally keep quiet about toys. Parents had three children, I am the youngest, and two more older brothers. Mom constantly drank, I almost never remember her sober form. When she was sober, he was very angry, beat us, apparently, the body broke from the desire to drink. Father stole something in a rural store, and he was put in prison. I remember, we wanted to eat with the brothers that we ran to the garden to the neighbor and straight from the beds ate dirty carrot. Then the mother was deprived of parental rights, and we were taken to the boarding school. You know, there I was much better. We were fed, dressed, and I didn't know the parental love, so I didn't miss her much.
Then I entered the school, we supported relationships with the brothers. In the dormitory, my girls in the evenings could have a cheap wine package to relax. I somehow did not think that I could turn into the same alcoholic as my mother. Think, a liter of wine on four girls, it is nonsense. I studied well, got a diploma, went to work. Every evening, after work, he drank a little wine for calm and good sleep. Even when it began to drink a bottle, I did not think that I rolling on the inclined as a mother.
Own family
When I met Fedor, it was already strongly dependent on alcohol. But we got married, our son was born. The year I fed his breast, while I could have a glass of beer or wine, then stacked the milk and fed the son with a mixture. When finished feeding, I turned out, I am pregnant again. My husband and I were happy, even though the second child has not yet planned. During this period, there was no alcohol in my life.I wanted to endure and give birth to a healthy child, because the first were questions. The first year with his son was often lying in hospitals, but I did not associate his health condition with his own habit. The daughter was born on time, but from the first day she practically slept at night. I was very overwhelmed, the milk was missing, and I stopped feeding with a breast. In the evenings, when the children fell asleep, I walked into the kitchen and saw wine. It helped me at least a little relax. Then the third child was born, I was sitting at home with children all the time, it became more likely to drink. Sometimes girlfriends came to me, and we could send children to play, and saw wine or champagne.
"Mom, do not drink"
One day, the younger son fell and hit greatly until I slept after the guest's visit. The eldest son called an ambulance, and when doctors arrived, they saw a drunk mother and children who were granted to themselves. Soon the workers of social care were pressed. We were registered, we are already there, although I no longer drink.
After that case, I did not quit alcohol. Husband works trucker, he disappears in flights, so I was granted myself. Somehow the children saw how I get a bottle from the refrigerator and pour into a glass. "Mommy, do not drink, please," the daughter cried. And then I was inverted inside. I poured the contents of the bottle and a glass into the sink, hugged the children and promised that I would no longer drink.
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Fighting dependency
I realized that for the sake of children and their future you need to tie with your destructive habit. I did not want them to repeat my destiny. First of all, I turned to a special clinic, in parallel I went in the evening at the gatherings in the society of anonymous alcoholics. All this helped me not break. The psychologist who worked with me, said that these situations often occur with alcoholics when they themselves become dependent on alcoholic beverages.
Employees of the guardianship scared, which will take children if I do not bother to drink. This is a powerful stimulus to start with a bad habit, because children are my life. If they were not, I would probably sleep a long time ago. Now our house reigns peace and peace. In the evenings, we arrange tea drinking at home, with your "girlfriends" - I do not meet there anymore. I try to maintain the household houses, invent traditions with children, for example, we go to the cafe on weekends. Always waiting for our dad from the flight, we prepare him a delicious dinner. Is it possible to exchange family happiness, love, comfort for dubious pleasure from alcohol?
I will give special importance to family breakfasts, lunch and dinners. I remember my hungry childhood, and I don't want my kids starving. In the refrigerator, we always have all the necessary products: fresh meat, eggs, milk, yoghurts, fish, fruits and vegetables. I love cook very much, and my daughter went to me, often helps me.
What does Alena dream of
All my dreams and future plans are associated with family. My husband and I want to build a big house and take some more kids from the orphanage. I imagine how noisy and fun we will have! In old age, children and grandchildren will come to us, relax in the garden, tear off the berry bush, fry a kebab, bathe in the bathhouse. I want to divide the garden, my farm, so that kids could eat fresh and home products.
For holidays, we now drink juice or compote. My husband is a driver, so he does not use alcohol at all, because how to sit behind the wheel? I realized that you can relax not only with the help of wine. Before bed I can drink tea on herbs, breathe air, admire the sunset sun. So many joys in life, and do not need to look for a way to get dubious pleasure. I really hope that my kids will not go in the footsteps of your grandmother and I try to inspire that alcohol and nicotine is evil. Here they began to walk on Sundays to church, there the soul becomes easier, it seems to be cleared. I am sure that everything will be wonderful in our family, because we love children and want the best future for them. And we will do everything so that it was.