Sithi lapho izingxabano phakathi kwabafowethu nodade zivela khona (nokuthi zingazigcina kanjani zilawulwa)
Kubukeka sengathi ubutha phakathi kwabafowethu nodadewethu babehlala bekhona, kungakhathalekile ukuthi banjani inkathi noma lapho bekhula khona. Umama wezingane ezimbili kanye nentatheli yeNew York Times Jessica Ground wanquma ukuthola ukuthi kungani i-MibyIngi izojatshulelwa, nokuthi inciphise inani lezimpi ezinegazi emindenini lapho ingane engaphezu kweyodwa. Kuhunyushwe i-athikili yakhe ngezinkontileka ezincane.
Ngesikhathi sobhubhane, ubudala bami oneminyaka emine ubudala futhi ubudala bahlangana kunanini ngaphambili: Ngizwa amahlandla ambalwa kusihlwa, ukugxila kuvela egumbini labo. Kepha isikhathi esengeziwe amantombazane ami ahlala ndawonye, kulapho axabana kakhulu.
Imvamisa, izingane zami zixabana ngesisekelo sokungabi nabulungisa noma emzabalazweni wendawo emgqeni.
Ukuxabana okungenangqondo okuvela kwakamuva kwenzeka lokhu kuwa, lapho sifika ekwenzeni ukugonywa komkhuhlane. Amantombazane asetshenziswe ngenxa yalowo ozoqala agonywe. Indodakazi yami endala "iwine" engxabanweni, kepha ngenkathi isondela ehhovisi lokugoma, wabona ukuthi empeleni ukugoma empeleni kwakuyimvuzo engathandeki.
Ngalezo zinsuku, lapho sonke sasivalela ndawonye ekhaya, futhi amahlazo azokhula abe yidrama yangempela, futhi siqala ukukhathazeka ngabo, futhi siqala ukukhathazeka ngabo, lapho siphendukela ngokuphelele, ngoba sivuma inani lokungaboni ngaso linye . Kepha, uma ukholwa uJanin Vivon, uprofesa wezengqondo waseNyuvesi yaseNew Jersey, owafundela ubutha phakathi kwabafowethu nodadewethu, khona-ke "ukuncintisana phakathi kwengane kuyinto ekhona. Futhi thina, njengabazali baseSigninigov nabazali bezingane, singazama kuphela ukubhekana nalokhu ngokusemandleni ngangokunokwenzeka. "
Ucwaningo luye lwabonisa ukuthi izingxabano eziphakathi kwezingane zakubo zingenzeka amahlandla ayisishiyagalombili ngehora (cishe. U-Ed.: Aaaaaa!). Olunye ucwaningo lubonise ukuthi ubudlelwano phakathi kwabesifazane busondele kakhulu, kodwa ngababili ababandakanya abafowethu, izingxabano eziningi.
Inani lezingxabano lincishiswe esikhathini sokubumba, zibonakala zibusheke. Izingane zakuqala naphakathi ziyisikhathi esinzima kunazo zonke ezinhlelweni zonya.
UMark utan Finberg, uprofesa we-University of Pennsylvania, umcwaningi emkhakheni wezempilo nentuthuko yabantu
Ocwaningweni, umbhali ongumhlangano wayo uFeneberg, kukhulunywa ngaye incwadi kaGenesise, ehlanganisa "izindaba eziyisisekelo zamasiko angokomoya asentshonalanga." Kuneziza eziningi eziphathelene nabazalwane abanomona nabenzi abanomona - ngokwesibonelo, ngo-Avele noma ngo-Avele noma ngoJakobe no-Inave. Futhi zonke lezi zindaba ziveza ukuthi abacwaningi bafunda manje: Izenzo zemfundo, umzabalazo wothando lwabazali nezinsizakusebenza, udonsa izingane ezingxabanweni zabazali. "
Ukuxabana phakathi kwama-Sibings kudala kangaka le minyaka eminingana edlule, lapho ukushona kwezingane kukhule kakhulu, izingane ezineminyaka engaphansi kwemihlanu ezaziba nabafowethu abaseduze kakhulu nabafowethu abaseduze. Lokhu kufa kungenzeka kuhlotshaniswa "nenani elandayo lezifo ezithathelwanayo zezingane emindenini enjalo, ukudla okunganele kukamama futhi, ngokunokwenzeka, kanye nomzabalazo ophelele ngokunakwa kwabazali," njengoba uSara Walters esho, uprofesa ohambisana noDemography ovela ku ILondon School of Hygiene nomuthi oshisayo. Ngazi, ngaqala ukubheka okuhlukile engxabanweni yezingane zami ngenxa ye-ayisikhilimu.
Futhi yize manje iningi lezinyoka lingalweli imvuthuluka yangempela, kusukela ekubukweni kwengqondo, lezi zingxabano zenza inhloso ethile: zisiza izingane ukuthola ukuthi zikhethekile futhi zihlukile, ngamanye amagama lokhu okubizwa ngokuthi "ukwehlukanisa" . Izingane zifuna ukuba abazali bazo zibanake ngokukhethekile, ngakho-ke, ngokusho kwamaVivons, bayohlala belwela isimo sengqondo esikhethekile maqondana ', ngokuqhathaniswa nabafowethu nodadewethu. Kepha ngaphandle kwalokhu, izintshisekelo zabo nezinhlamvu zazo zingakhiwa azungeze amakhono nezifiso ze-siblingov yazo.
Isibonelo, ake sithi indodana yakho endala iyinkanyezi yebhola. Ingane encane noma izingane zingagwema ibhola noma ngoba zesaba ukuthi ngeke zilunge njengomfowabo, noma ngoba zesaba ukuthi zizoba ngcono kunaye - futhi futhi azilungele ukuzibeka engcupheni. Noma mhlawumbe bobabili bazobe beseqenjini lebhola, kodwa elidala - ngoba lisebenza ngenkuthalo, kanti omncane - ngoba uzozitholela isimo sehlaya lendawo.
Naphezu kweqiniso lokuthi izingxabano eziphakathi kwengane yakini kulindeleke impela, lokhu akusho ukuthi awukwazi ukubathonya. Nazi izincomo ezinhlanu ezivela ochwepheshe ukuthi bangabhekana kanjani nezingane ezidlule.
Qaphela ukuthi yini ebangela ukungqubuzana."Naka lokho okwenzeke okwenzeka ngaphambi kokuba kukhule," kusho uSally Bevil Hunter, uprofesa ahlangana noprofesa ocwaningweni lomndeni kanye nomndeni ovela e-University of Tennessee.
Isibonelo, uma izingane zakho zixabana ngaso sonke isikhathi, lapho zidlala imidlalo yevidiyo, zibe seziseduze lapho zihlala phansi zizodlala. Lalela amagama athile nemisho ethile ukunquma lezo ezizwakalayo ngolaka futhi zama ukungenelela ngaphambi kokuba isimo siphethwe.
Basize bafunde ukuxazulula ukungqubuzana.Ngemuva kokuthi wonke umuntu athule, zama ukunciphisa izingane zakho futhi axoxe ngenkinga "ngaphandle kwamacala nezinkolelo," weluleka nge-Fineberg. Nikeza ingane ngayinye ithuba lokukhuluma, ngaphandle kokuphazamisa, futhi umeme ngamunye wazo ukuthi acabange ngendlela yokuxazulula inkinga.
Usuvele usezingeni lesikole elisencane, izingane ziyakwazi "ukwazisa ukuthi yiziphi zalezi zinqumo ezizuzisa wonke umuntu, nokuthi amathuba amaningi azosebenza futhi alethe injabulo ngokuzayo." Kubalulekile futhi ukubafundisa ukubuyela ezinkingeni lapho ezinye izinqumo ziyeka ukusebenza.
Badumise nakancane, kepha bagxeka bodwa.Uma izingane zakho zibonisa umusa komunye nomunye, "zibadumise ngokuqinile nangokuzwakalayo," kusho umzingeli. Isibonelo: "Ngiyathanda ukuthi uvumele udadewethu ukuba ahambe kuqala!" Kepha uma ubathuka, zama ukukwenza ukuze enye ingane ingakuzwanga, ngoba uma kungenjalo angayisebenzisa njengesikhali.
Indodakazi yethu endala ijabulela noma yiliphi ithuba lokuvula udadewabo omncane ("Khumbula, umama wathi ngeke ugxume kusofa!") Ngakho-ke ngamukela lesi seluleko nge-akhawunti yami.
Zama ukuthola izikhathi zonke ezihlanganisa.Amashubhu nezinhlamvu zezingane zakho zingalingana, futhi kungenzeka zingabi njalo. Bobabili bangathanda ukudansa, futhi mhlawumbe umuntu othanda ukudansa, kanti omunye ufuna ukudlala chess. Umuntu angagcina ulondoloze, kanti omunye, ngokuhlukile, inkululeko-enothando. "Zama ukuthola amakilasi ajwayelekile avumela wonke umuntu ukuthi akhombise ukuvumelana nezimo, futhi ngasikhathi sinye axhumane," kusho uJanin Vivon.
Ngilethe isibonelo kusihlwa somndeni ngokubuka i-movie njengenye yalezi zifundo, kodwa ngaphawula ukuthi sivame ukuphuma isikhathi sokunquma ukuthi iyiphi movie esibukeka ngayo, ngoba wonke umuntu uhlala ephikisana njalo.
Iqiniso lokuthi kudinga isikhathi esiningi alikhiphi iqiniso lokuthi kuyinto ebalulekile, "kusho uWivon. - Uzohlangabezana nezingxabano, lokhu akugwenywa.
Ngenxa yalokho, sonke sahlabelela ndawonye, baxhumane, badla ama-popcorn, futhi izingane zethu zithola amakhono abalulekile, ngokwesibonelo, njengekhono lokuthola ukuyekethisa, noma ngabe sibheka "indaba yendaba" yesikhathi seshumi nanhlanu.
Umkhandlu okhethekile wesikhathi sobumeme.UHunter uthi: "Sonke sichitha isikhathi esithe xaxa ekhaya, ikakhulukazi ebusika. "Ngicabanga ukuthi ezinye zalezi zingxabano zinengqondo impela ukuxazulula, zinikeza izingane ukuthatha uhambo noma zigijime ngasendlini."
Izingane ziba novalo lapho zide zisendaweni evaliwe, ngakho-ke umsebenzi othile womzimba - noma ngabe kuyibharisi lasekhaya lezingqinamba ezenziwe ngemicamelo, "kuzosiza ukukhipha isimo.
Isafunde ngesihloko
Igama elithi "mbiweyo "libonisa izingane zabanye abazali - abafowethu nodadewethu